Poem: For Now

We watched the lightning show from my bedroom window, carmine and hibiscus dancing behind charcoal clouds,angelic hallelujah light. I scolded youfor being on your phone, but you were curiousabout gas excitation and electrons so,in retrospect, that was probably okay.Apparently lightning is five times hotterthan the sun, and Zeus is married to Hera,the goddess of childbirthContinue reading “Poem: For Now”

collected thoughts, x

Words have not come easy the past couple of weeks. I flounder in letters and punctuation marks, holding my breath to stop the panic in the spaces between conscious and unconscious thought. It’s funny because I don’t know what that means. It’s funny because I don’t know what to do, and God knows but he’sContinue reading “collected thoughts, x”

Good-bye, Instagram

Note: I’ve kept this post in “Drafts” for quite a while. It seemed self-indulgent to publish in the midst of everything that erupted shortly after I wrote the post. But with the growing awareness around the country of social media’s power for change (and also its troubling, relentless control over our minds), I thought I’dContinue reading “Good-bye, Instagram”

collected thoughts, ix

One year ago today, I was on my way to London. * The midnight after “Notes on a Conditional Form” was released, I texted Kailin, “How we feeling about the new 1975 album?” and thus ensued an intense conversation about postmodernism, lyrics, intimacy, all the “behind the song” cards included with each track in Spotify,Continue reading “collected thoughts, ix”

From the first page of summer’s journal

Just now a heron (a crane? a stork?) flew right over me as I stood by my window watching the dusk gather itself into evening, and I am at a loss for words to describe how it made me feel. As its form rose over the trees and turned to climb above the fields, IContinue reading “From the first page of summer’s journal”

collected thoughts, vii

Once, I thought a tiny tumbleweed was a groundhog with matted fur. Then it blew away. * Last week I revised an essay about love lost, love learned, and love rediscovered. It was a lot more emotionally exhausting to write than I thought it would be. I kept crying. Among many other things, the pastContinue reading “collected thoughts, vii”

collected thoughts, vi

One morning this past week, I spilled half a glass of chocolate milk on my father’s newspaper and my beloved copy of “Lila.” I censored my under-breath curse, snatched up a few stray paper towels to mop up the mess. If it had been coffee the incident would have struck me as being a pinnacleContinue reading “collected thoughts, vi”

Slowing Down for Joy

Even in the midst of a time that comes with a forced slowing down, I’m hurrying. My attention span is nonexistent, darting from one thing to the next and back again in cyclical motions to the point of not getting anything done at all. Or, when the thing gets done (finishing a book, writing anContinue reading “Slowing Down for Joy”

collected thoughts, v

It is blue hour now, the sky tinged with violet hues that ache with soft pink and washed-out yellow. * I stopped listening to Of Monsters and Men for several months last semester. In the midst of grief, of lamenting the necessity of goodbyes and see-you-laters, the melodies were too jarring. They made me cry.Continue reading “collected thoughts, v”